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2015-09-06 - 12:16 a.m.

This is going to be an egregious brag-fest. Just know that going in and forgive me for it later. I have to vent and I know too many early birds who are not up for me to tell this to, so I must tell it here, Dear Diary, and risk annoying my 3 faithful readers.

I made fine use of my Saturday. I've been thinking of trading in my car for a while now. It is time to get my 60,000 mile transmission service, which costs hundreds of dollars, my car needs new tires very soon, more hundreds of dollars, and the registration and inspection just expired, so it's time to go do those things which cost money and time. So it seems like a good time to trade up. I'm also in a good place value wise, where my car has optimum trade in value right now which will only go down as time goes on.

My dilemma has been whether I should go for a luxury car like a Mercedes (and the crazy payment that goes with it), or just buy a nice new loaded Sorento, because I've been very, very happy with my Sorento. Kia puts out a fine quality SUV with many great features. High safety ratings, good comfortable roomy vehicle for a very reasonable price and you just cannot beat the warranty. So, I researched how much trade in value my car had, got all my personal effects out of the car, went to the dealership where I bought it, and got myself a brand new one!! This thing is so flipping loaded it's like Disneyland on wheels.

I shall now describe this beast: First, it is very spiffy looking. The paint is pearl white with shiny chrome accents and a cute spoiler. Tres chic. My old Sorento was a light silver color and I liked it a lot. The new car has this upgraded chrome package on it. The model is the SXL V6, it's the highest level model Sorento has. It goes L, LX, EX, SXL. It is All Wheel Drive, which I guess is the same as 4 wheel drive? This is awesome if I move to Colorado. The upholstery is Napa Leather, which is very luxe, very soft. It has a 3rd row of seats, which would really come in handy if I had 7 kids, but alas, it's just me... But the 3rd row folds down for more cargo area and that's how I will use it. It has heated and COOLED seats!!! I had a cold hiney on the drive home. I love that!!! It has a premium sound system. I'm stoked about that. Fancy alloy wheels. They are so pretty. It comes with 3 months of Sirius radio. I need to do a road trip to fully enjoy that. Maybe I should go see my folks after all. haha. The steering wheel has 3 settings for how the car handles. You can have it set for sporty, and two other settings that I can't remember right now. I don't fully understand that yet. I'm going to take it out riding tomorrow and figure out all these features. It has blue tooth, navigation, and this big screen for the GPS and other computer things. It's a touch screen. The car will call 911 for me if I wreck. There's a USB port. It's like a computer on wheels. Oh, big ole sunroof, which I have never cared about, but it's pretty cool! I had it open riding home. There are window shades that retract, rear air, the car talks to me like Kitt on Knight Rider! haha. It greets the driver even before the ignition comes on. Tells you goodbye when you turn it off. It has a back up cam. The rear view mirror has some special features. It will open my garage door, so I don't need my automatic garage door opener anymore. It automatically adjusts the brightness in the mirror so someone with brights on can't blind you from behind. The rear door has a push button open and close feature. So no more pulling and pushing on that door. They said it is the most ridiculously loaded car they had on the lot or showroom. Every single bell and whistle is on this bad boy. It only had 348 miles on it when I drove it off the lot. Push button ignition, fancy steering wheel, storage compartments in back. Individual temperature controls. The seats are all kinds of automatic and you can make them go up, down, back, forward, lumbar support, heat, cool, and you can set your preferences so if someone else drives your car and changes everything, you can fix it back like you like it with the touch of one button. It has privacy tinting and some kind of special interior lighting. I'm sure there are many things I'm leaving out. It's just really super fantastico. It feels much roomier in the front than my old Sorento did. They've changed the design. It's crazy good. I might have to sleep in it. Now: on to the haggling portion of my tale...

In business, in pay negotiations, in my car and house deals, I'm good at negotiations. (Thanks Mom) I'm kind of unflappable and I can't be rushed or intimidated. I know the tricks they are going to pull and I can head them off and counter them with my own tricks. I'm ballsy enough to say a price that I know cuts way into their profit. I go in with the facts, I have a goal range, and I know where I'm going and what my best and final is going to be before I ever sit down with the sales manager. I will leave without buying anything if he pisses me off or won't meet my goal range. Salesmen are not ready for that. They think they can always get you emotional and hasty, especially if you have ovaries. My bluff works because I am not bluffing.

I walked in there with the plan to get a top of the line, ultra loaded ride for about 38K, plus a decent trade in on my car. Kelley Blue Book goes a little higher than local dealerships, but it gave me an idea of what is fair and expected. Of course, to hear the sales manager tell it, this was a complete impossibility, because the sticker on this pimped ride was just under 48K. Noooooo Waaaaaaay am I getting it for 38K. Not. Even. Possible. Can't happen. Won't. Ain't. Not.

Nope.

Ultimately, they caved after insisting it wasn't even possible for hours. I started out with a cocky, impatient sales manager, who thought he was going to mesmerize me with numbers and fast talk and sales pitch and who was *NOT* going to go a penny under 42K (he said I could just take it or leave it) and by the end I had him scrambling to receive the 38 and still give me a decent trade in. They went so far as to bring me out another car of lesser value to get it to a lower price but I took one look and told them I didn't even need to drive it, I knew I didn't want it. It didn't have the push button ignition and I gots to have that. He told me I would have to give up the options I wanted to get the price range I was after so I pulled out the old chestnut that seems to WORK. EVERY. TIME. I said "I'm so sorry I've kept you people here so long. I can see this is not going to come together and the fact is, I work from home, and there's not a thing wrong with the Sorento I drove over here. I am going to wait till the end of the year."

You want to see some hasty back peddling?? Let a sales manager think he's got a sale in the bag and then politely and apologetically change your mind and back out, saying it must not be meant to happen. Especially after he has seen your excellent credit score and knows you will pass the financing. All of a sudden he believes he can try a thing or two and just maybe... meet your terms.

The sales lady who worked with me and went on the test drive with me told me later that a few potential buyers had tried to get financing for that car at full price and slightly less, no one had gotten him anywhere near as low as I did. She said the other people who had tried to buy it couldn't get the financing.

Then the finance guy pulled a fast one, and he doesn't even know I know. I often don't let on when I know stuff, (ain't that right, bwah?) But here's what happened there: I knew I was going to buy the super duper warranty going in. I bought it last time and it served me very well. So... dude gives me the sales pitch for the warranty and various crap you can buy like windshield protection and dealer's vacation fund, credit life, etc. I chose none. I said just give me the car and I don't need any further warranty. I had seen the interest rate was 4.69 for my car loan. This becomes important later. So he told me all this warranty protection plus this and that would only cost me an extra 30 bucks a month. I'm all "No". So he offered to give me free windshield protection. Me: "No". I asked him if he could take some off the warranty cost, (knowing he could). So he said yes and he took off 10% and got the payment down some. But I'm all "No". So he said "Hey... Labor Day! Let me apply the Labor Day coupon". This was just a trick, because there is no labor day coupon. What he did was he changed by interest rate to 3.9. This brought my payment down to the goal range and I said "Yes". I know they get financing quotes from different lenders, but you'd think they would try get you the best deal they could. I bet they start out with a higher one so they can go down a little and make you happy with what you think is a discount. They don't have to be fancy or sneaky with me. All they have to do is hit my goal range and they get a deal. But I guess the fancy foot work is the fun part.

So now I am feeling really good about this new car. I love it. It has way more power than my old Sorento, because this one has 6 cylinders. I'm going to start a car buying chain reaction in my family. haha.

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