2015-08-25 - 10:16 a.m.
Have I ever mentioned that I have a very sweet nephew whom I love?
We had a happy homecoming yesterday and he was so sweet. He was all eager to visit and he stayed right with me until I was too tired to stay up any longer. He seemed so relieved and happy to be home. I had zero desire to tell him to GTFO. haha. For all the frustrations and annoyances big and small, I love the kid and we are both refreshed and ready to accomplish what we were supposed to be doing. I may have been the victim of a very convincing charmer, but I think he really did learn a few lessons about what he doesn't want out of life. He spent the whole summer sweating his ass off for not enough money, living in a shitty little travel trailer with his drug-addicted father. He seems a little traumatized by all he had to see and witness over the summer. He is so relieved to be back here and yet he is very worried about leaving his dad. He desperately hopes his dad is going to clean up, if he lives. Father of the year has slowed down his drug use, though he hasn't kicked it completely, and he broke up with his skanky girlfriend who was his drug supplier.
Nephew wants to do well in school and stay out of the little Podunk town he came from. As much as I didn't want him to spend any length of time around the bad influence, it did give him a great big dose of the ugly reality that goes with that kind of life and he seems truly ready to move forward and do well. Let's hope he keeps his momentum when the going gets tough. I desperately want him to avoid going down the same drain his dad has been circling for the past 20 years.
No kid has ever needed a good solid male example in his life more than this boy. He has my dad, but that is his grandpa and he has his own role to live in the boy's life. Nephew really bonded with my true love, and he felt that family connection with him. I'm like a mom to the nephew and my guy was considered his uncle/male role model. He filled a desperately needed place in our nephew's life until he withdrew. The kid looked up to him so much. I'm so sorry he bailed. Nephew has seen too much of that in his life.
Personal note: You didn't "owe" the boy anything and you apparently feel that you owe me nothing, but God how we needed you. You broke my heart and you broke his too, though he will never be able to tell you so. Now he is a man, but he has loved you since he was a little tiny guy. Remember him asking you if you could beat up this guy or that guy? One time he said that he was totally sure you could beat up his dad. Do you have any idea how significant that is? He transferred his adoration from his father to you. It was a sacred position, love. I have so many things to tell you... things I don't want to write about here. Maybe someday you'll have a change of heart and at least be a friend.
I would not have believed it if God himself had dropped down from the sky and told me you would later just toss us aside to go pursue a life with this "friend" who meant nothing to you. I'm still blown away by it. I believed in you completely and did not doubt your word.
I will always love you and will always have that corey shaped scar in my heart.