2020-07-28 - 2:01 p.m.
Good grief, I haven't done an entry since June 3? There have been many times I thought I should write one, but apparently I didn't do it any of those times.
I had some crazy stuff going on.
Most notably, I realized that my ex husband's second wife's mean streak towards one of their kids goes beyond overly strict and into actual abuse. I had to intervene.The kids are all adopted (because God knew she was not mother material and made her infertile) She managed to go around God's plan and adopt these 4 precious kids. My ex and his wife have always seemed ridiculously overboard with rules and punishment for these little inmates. They took some kind of parenting courses that taught them that crack babies need a lot of structure and you must keep the upper hand or they will go buck wild.
I found out this crazy bitch had my Godson on food punishment for months and he had lost so much weight he looked like he had anorexia. I went ape shit and quickly confronted my ex (without his wife) and told him starving a kid is child abuse and I can not, will not, shall not live with it. I told him that kid had better fatten up by the time I see him again or there is going to be a serious problem. I told him to go home and tell his mean ass wife that food punishment is child abuse and will not happen anymore. Period. He is scared of her. She is apparently quite the rage monster. But I was able to convince him that this is straight up child abuse and HE has to protect the kids. He has been having these mysterious panic attacks for a while and it turns out, it's because he has been turning a blind eye to some really abusive "mothering" from his wife to that sweet little boy. He knew it was wrong but he says he feared she would take the kids and leave him and then they'd be totally at her mercy. But he knew it was wrong and he felt guilty.
I took the boy for a week, to make sure he ate well and had a week of no hassles and no mean stuff directed at him. It was presented to the abuser that she needed a break. He was a sweet angel the entire time. No problems, except for the normal disruption of having to produce meals, entertainment, clean clothes, and constant guidance to a little kid when you're not used to having to do all that. We had a really good week and I'm glad we got to have that time, one on one. Of course he asked me 9 ways from Sunday if he can come live with me forever. I do not want to raise another kid, but I will if they can't raise him without abuse. My ex is weak, but malleable. He listens to me. I feel sorry for the kids having to endure either of these assholes, but if they are just strict and not abusive, it's not all tragedy. I am keeping a close eye on these kids and if I see abuse, I will get involved every time. I had to proceed carefully, because if bitch ass gets mad, she could cut me out of their life and someone has to watch and monitor. I don't want to jerk the kids out of their home and have them go back into the system. The 2 oldest have learned how to exist within the crazy rules and avoid punishment. But little guy doesn't yet know how to control his every thought and deed to please these unpleasable fartknockers. The youngest child is truly loved and spoiled by them. They managed to bond with that last one.
I could write 3 novels about this ordeal and situation. But I don't want to make this any longer than it has to be. The abuser was hoping that I would take him and find out just how bad he is. But he was just a good, normal, loving, pleasant little boy the whole week. He did what I told him to do. He went to bed at night with zero fuss. He was trustworthy and well behaved. He's so cute, I cannot imagine her wanting to take away his food. I just cannot understand it. He told me "Dad said 'no more food punishment' he won't let mom take my food anymore!" He smiled when he said it.
I will be monitoring that situation. God knows I don't want to raise another child, but if they can't raise him without abusing him, I'd rather raise him myself than let him suffer. I'm just hoping my ex, the nutless wonder can stay on his hind legs and make sure his wife is not abusing the kids.