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2018-04-25 - 5:26 p.m.

I got my house ready for photos. The photo session went well, the pictures are good and the listing should be up in a day or two.

WHEW

Now all I have to do is make my bed as soon as I leave it in the mornings, keep everything put away at all times, wash each dish as I use it, hide all evidence of dogs and GTFO at a moments' notice when realtors call saying they want to show the house. I hope the very first lookers buy it so I won't have to go through that a bunch of times. Oh dread.

My parents are moving the first week in May. My new house deal closes on May 31. My ex husband and his bunch are also moving. They spent the past 5 days or so up there and found a house to buy. They signed their papers and I guess we're all going to be one big happy family. Har Har. We really are. I like my sister wife. We all get along fine.

I will be glad when I get moved in to the new house and have my internet connection set up and my work space all ready to go. I think I'm going to take a week off to get moved. I need time to get everything up and running before I'm expected to work. I hope none of my stuff gets damaged in the move. My TV seems fragile to me. It's a great big curved screen TV. I hope it makes it. If not, I'll be buying a new great big curved screen TV.

One day I walked into Costco and there was a guy standing in the TV section trying to snag passers buy for a sales pitch. I looked at a curved screen TV and he started telling me "You don't want one of those because..." I don't even remember what he said but I found it to be totally wrong. I own one and everything he said negative about it was incorrect by my own experience. So I said "Oh really? I have one of these at home and I don't find that to be true at all." We kept on strolling and my sister said something about me not being shy to shoot down a guy's talking points. I didn't think it was unusual to say that this is not the experience I have as a curved screen owner but my sister is much MUCH nicer than I am and she avoids the blunt truth. I, on the other hand, don't realize I've said something too direct until I see the look of horror on her face.

I'm also not shy about calling out a covert farter. I was at Sam's Club one day, getting a new phone and a big fat oaf in a blue shirt walked through and just crop dusted us all. I went off like an unstable stick of dynamite. I got a whiff of his disgusting guts and just snapped. Everyone in that area of the store looked nauseous so I pointed him out and loudly said "That guy right there just crop dusted us. The guy in the blue shirt. He farted! Right there, THAT guy." He started walking faster. Getting the heck out of dodge. I figure if some scumbag has the nerve to walk by and spray ass in public, he can prepare to be called out.

I get loud and unmanageable when I'm exposed to a sudden stink or an unpleasant shock. I started yelling "It's BAD, It's BAD! Spoiled crab! Bad seafood!" in a restaurant one time because they served us spoiled crab legs and it smelled just like ammonia. I didn't mean to do that. I had temporary insanity due to the shock of smelling ammonia on the crab legs. I just flipped out. I'm normally pretty quiet and proper, but let me get disoriented with shock and you'll find out everything I think about you and the horse you rode in on.

I've never seen wait staff show up so fast. Four servers were at our table within seconds. LOL

I still have work to do. I fervently wish to be done so I can lounge and NOT WORK for a hot minute. And by hot minute, I mean several weeks in a row. I need my jobs more than ever, and I love my jobs, but I'm stressed with all this crap I have going on. I wish I could be off until I am relocated without fear of losing my jobs permanently. I need to start buying lottery tickets. Or something. I'm buying a much more expensive house than I'm selling, but my payment will be the same as I have now because the property tax is so much less there! I'm going to re-amortize my new loan after my house sells and then I'll have a much smaller payment than I have now! So this is a good move for me financially, but I still feel vulnerable because ... house buying.

My new porch is awesome and I want to get a porch swing or some gliders maybe to put out there. I also want to clear coat my new fence because I'm aware that fences go the way of all things rather quickly if you don't seal them. Lesson learned.

Back to the old grind...

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