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2016-06-30 - 4:38 p.m.

Ahhhhh... you hear that? It's the stunning absence of a piercing smoke detector chirp. The relief is immense. The birthday boy showed up and took care of every battery, every recessed light, and he re-did my baseboards where the hot water heater busted and ruined the perfection of the palace for a time. I still have to get a carpet man to install some new padding in the guest room and re-stretch the carpet. The little details of life, man.

The handyman conveniently worked it into the conversation that he is single. Suddenly I wanted him to know my adult nephew lives here. So I casually worked that in to the conversation. That whole "woman alone" thing is uncomfortable when there's a strange man standing in your house and no one else knows he is there. He was a nice man though. He didn't say anything creepy. I did check him out before I called to schedule work. My neighbor 3 doors down has hired him before and some of her friends have too. I'm sure he is a decent person.

Single men let a lady know he is single. Married men let a lady know his wife is an insufferable bitch. hahaha. Life is funny.

I'm savoring the last bit of easy work life. Next week begins a fresh Hell. I am assigned to a large facility and they are already trying to pin a task on me that has nothing to do with my job. They want me to do a part of their audit process which by all rights should be done by a person onsite. Not by the remote corporate staff. I have respectfully requested that we leave me out of their in-house processes and we shall see. If they cut a fit about it I will end up having to do it. It will just be an extra hassle at the end of each day. I'd like to avoid that.

Something weird just happened. The doorbell rang and it was UPS with a return label for me. It had my name on it and the guy was telling me to just affix the label to my item and call them back or drop it in the mail if it's small enough to fit. I asked what is this for and the guy said I'm apparently returning an item to Pottery Barn. I am not returning anything. I didn't call. I haven't ordered lately. This is out of nowhere. He said "I guess Pottery Barn wants something back." I said "Well, they can't have it! I like it!"

I have a beautiful 4 piece wine rack/cabinet/coffee bar thingy from Pottery Barn. It's 4 heavy pieces and I also have some pillows and things, duvet covers, etc. I'm a Nester. I nest. It's what I do.

Maybe I should call Pottery Barn and see what they were trying to accomplish by sending me a return label. I should box up this heavy office chair that I don't want and send it to them all postage paid. I didn't even buy it from Pottery Barn. They might not like that.

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