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2017-10-04 - 6:59 p.m.

Andrew is tossing things around and making changes in D Land. There are some bugs being worked out. I guess I will keep this fairly short and if it doesn't post I won't feel like I lost a manifesto.

Some things have happened since I last updated. I had a birthday on October 1. Isn't is appropriate that my birthday is on the first day of the fiscal year? I've always liked that. My mom was very nice to hold me in till the fiscal year. October is my favorite month. Autumn is my favorite season.

Something else happened... something that my whole family has dreaded for a long time. My uncle finally died. He was a very well loved person. I haven't ever known anyone quite like him. He was the most generous person alive. When I was little, I was the only kid in the family for a while... I was the oldest grandchild in both my mom's and my dad's families. I was the only niece for my uncle. He spoiled me like nobody's business. He bought me huge stuffed animals and took me places. One of my favorite things he used to do was take me to an old fashioned candy store with big glass jars full of candy and he would hand me a big paper grocery bag and tell me to fill it up. I was able to go all over that store and pick absolutely anything I wanted. The first time, when I had gotten some candy and brought the bag back to him, he told me there wasn't nearly enough in it and I had to go back and get some more. He was THAT guy. He liked for everything he did to be over the top. He repeated that treatment with all the kids who came along after me. My sister and cousins all got the special treatment. (But I got it the most because I had a few years on the others.) He also played guitar and sang and he loved to laugh and eat. He was all about inviting people over to eat and play music. He was a really special, loving, wonderful person and he left this world too soon.

I was saddened by the Las Vegas shootings and I'm just so very tired of the evil-doers of the world. It would be awesome if people could focus on their own life and let everybody else live without popping off and going on a shooting rampage, or becoming violent because someone disagreed with them politically. Or murdering en masse because they think their God has mandated it. I'm sick of it all. I'm sick of Antifa using fascism to shut down free speech, I'm sick of all the colors of lives that matter, I'm sick of liberals throwing hissy fits and politicizing absolutely every single thing in the world, I'm sick of being told I'm a racist because I turned out white. I don't blame anyone for whatever race they were born. We can't choose that. I do blame assholes for being assholes though. That egregious behavior you chose? It's worse than anyone's race could ever be, ass-clown. If I thought there was a civilized corner in the world where this crap wouldn't be happening, I'd go there.

I'm thinking of taking up drugs and alcohol. (Kidding, but the frustration is real.) Then, as if I were not bummed enough by the grim reaper's overtime activities... Tom Petty died. I mean, hold on just a damn minute. What is this crap with the music makers of my life dying left and right? Tom Petty was so slim and trim and seemed healthy enough. I just didn't expect him to kick it early. I asked Alexa to play "Don't Do Me Like That" by Tom Petty because it is one of my favorite songs of his and after that I wanted to hear "Don't come around here no more" which is another fave... then Mary Janes Last Dance, then Refugee, the Free Falling, then American Girl... and I realized that I pretty much liked everything he did and I had not realized that his music makes a big part of the soundtrack of my life.

BUMMED.

::sigh::

So all this death puts me in a mind of my one true love who tragically died because grief reminds you of other grief. I feel like I've been in serious grief for 2 years. My brother in law kicked it off and there has been a freakin lot of dying going on since then. So I decided to watch some videos posted by my true love and he had a youtube channel with subscribers who didn't know what happened to him. I found some videos asking what happened to him and to my utter amazement and disgust, I found where the "other woman" made up a profile using his username and "widow" and she announced that she was his wife... and said some other things that are not true. She took credit for some things that had nothing to do with her (and everything to do with me) and I am officially pissed. First of all, she was not his wife. She couldn't even be considered common law. She was a fling at best.

Bish please.

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